:: it's a scary world: rants from a chemically imbalanced mind ::

:: Friday, May 30, 2003 ::

okay, nemo's pretty amusing.... as animated features go.... it ain't no heavy metal but then what is...... gimme fritz the cat anyday of the week....... it's easily on a par with toy story and monsters inc though... and do stay thru the credits.. it's not MUCH of a payoff but it's a pretty decent one if you happen to be a pixar fan. and note to george lucas - nobody cares. okay, maybe not NObody but a hell of a lot less care than used to. READ HERE, O FAITHFUL ONE! nope. not gettin' a sawbuck from me, georgie. i'll wait till it hits the bootlegger circuit, thank you. and it will. you've pissed off too many fans for it not to.

on a more political note (oh no! the moron's gonna bitch about bush again!!) ..... thanks to our commander in chief for cutting out the tax relief for families that make between $10,000 and $26,500... (and yes, there are families who live on that though i can't imagine how in today's world...... kudos to them and a big hunk of bile for the republican party)... seems that part of the tax benefit package was a last minute victim of the white house and the republicans. READ MORE HERE!! ..... and be very afraid... because i think this sick, megalomaniacal bastard has a good shot at a second term. oh christ. i wonder what switzerland is like this time of year......
 

:: Shaman 5/30/2003 09:27:05 PM [+] ::
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humans SUCK. PERIOD. but on the other hand, led zeppelin rules. the new zep 2 dvd set hits stores tuesday and thanks to chuckles, i've got my copy days early.... so this weekend, it's mechassault, led zeppelin and relaxation.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
 

:: Shaman 5/23/2003 05:18:34 PM [+] ::
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wow. woooooowwwww. the things you learn on a day to day basis. like cigarettes. man oh MAN there is some INTERESTING shit in these things! boy but the list of ingredients in rj reynolds smokes on their site is at the same time terrifying and giggly..... chicory... caramel... brown sugar.... carrot oil... cinnamon..... Mmmmm... YUMMY SMOKES!!!! no damn WONDER i like 'em so much!! hell, who WOULDN'T?!?! hexyl alcohol..... bad... honey... GOOD..... mmmmmmm lemon oil! and then you hit the magic one. urea. if you don't know what urea is, click the word. oh just gross. and WHY?!?!?! why somebody gotta be peein' on my smokes!?!?! and water. yes, water is actually a listed ingredient in rj reynolds cigarettes. hmm... that seems kind of self defeating. would explain mine occasionally going out on their own. but feel free to go peruse the list yourself, CLICK HERE!!! pretty damned interesting reading, if you ask me. esPECIALLY if you smoke :) in other smoker's news.... the state of mississippi shows some intelligence - READ ON, O TRUE BELIEVER. simple fact - you smoke, you take a chance on dying. cope. what else can give you coooooool, nerve dampening refreshing taste heheheeheh......
 

:: Shaman 5/13/2003 08:03:24 PM [+] ::
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certain people were born to do only one thing in this world. example - george lucas. he has no other real function in society but to create the star wars films. (and steadily get worse at doing it, but that's another topic.) which brings us to our celebrity hack of the day... shakira.... oh i'm the first to admit i own her cd... it's killer. but she was born to do latin music only. ONLY. i just witnessed her butcher aerosmith's dood looks like a lady beyond the point of redemption. holy SHIT. if you haven't seen the video yet, just kazaa it and do a search in video on shakira dude looks like ... you'll find it. and on broadband, it'll take between 4 and 10 minutes depending on how many pigs are sharing it at that given point in time..... and on modem... well, just hang it up. by the time you finish downloading it, we'll have a new president and it'll all be a moot point. sorry, i just calls 'em as i see's 'em. but i digress. as i usually do. grab the vid. holy god she sucks. except at latin music. and speaking of people who were born to do one thing and one thing only, william shatner is in the news again hehehehehe.... could NOT resist that one.... and god love the tilf - he sent me the article from the local paper.... see, dammit... now that i'm working 100 miles away, i NEVER know what's going on in my own damned town.... i can quote you msnbc stories and headlines 24 hours a day cuz i loves dat news.... but locally, hell, i'm just now figuring out the city is apparently widening richmond road here... which, if you know this town, is a NIGHTMARE of epic proportions.... the only road busier, in my guesstimation, is nicholasville road... but again, i digress.... tony read this and sent it to me in the spirit of the "harness the power of your massive cock!" rant a few days ago - READ ON, TRUE BELIEVER!!! SHATNER SUED OVER SADDLEBRED SEMEN!! .... (that means click the link, clem.). alright, the medications kicking in... i'm .... i'm..... losing my bitterness.... losing my sarcasm........ NOT!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! but the medication IS kicking in so i'll end this travesty here. till i foam at the mouth again, fondly yours, mister "yes, i AM an agent of satan but my duties are largely ceremonial" is goin' nighty-night.
 

:: Shaman 5/08/2003 11:30:55 PM [+] ::
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i'd like to ask for a moment of silence. today, i lost zong I. i was preparing to retire it from the system and got a little clumsy. it was a clean snap at the neck. eerily coincidental, if you ask me. like it KNEW i was retiring it and it figured it's life was over. sigh. so sad to see one so young go so quickly.

(cue herman's hermits - there's a kind of hush)

bowing head.
 

:: Shaman 5/06/2003 07:26:40 PM [+] ::
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HARNESS THE POWER OF YOUR MASSIVE COCK TODAY!!!

okay, if i get ONE more goddamned email with the above or anything remotely similar as the subject mind, i'm gonna have no choice but to kill SOMEone. i'm not sure but i'll find someone deserving. CHRIST. did you realize that approximately THREE QUARTERS (75%!!!!) of the email currently flying around the web is SPAM?? holy wrong number, batman! and you thought junk mail from the local postman was bad. hell, if i got NEAR this much snail mail, i'd never have time to do anything BUT open mail!! and unfortunately with me having had the same email addy and domain for about 9 years now, i CAN'T change it.... but going thru 90-120 (yes, i'm serious) emails every evening can get REAL old REAL quick. especially when (on the average) FIVE of those 100 some odd emails turn out to be legitimate correspondence from friends or ebay (may they burn in hell) buyers. (ebay, not the buyers) i used to think it was crazy but i'm REALLY diggin' this "penny or two for each email you send" idea/theory/possibility.... yea, it would cost you and me, the average joe user, a buck or two a month BUT imagine the THOUSANDS or HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS it would cost spammers... and even MORE if you had the ability to mark the email as "spam/unaccepted" and send it back to them with the "return email" cost ALSO being eaten by them!!! OH YEA BABY!!! what a wonderful world that would be. not that it'll EVER happen. but it's a warm, comforting thought.

meanwhile, i'm off to go thru 103 emails i've just received in. and at a quick glance, i'm seeing 6 that are legit. damn cycle of life.

oh. and by the way..might i add.... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! (click the laughter for the punchline)
 

:: Shaman 5/05/2003 09:38:35 PM [+] ::
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did i not say something about this a MONTH ago?!?! READ THIS!! DAMMIT i told you so. okay, we're neck and neck now for the sleaziest operator.... and it's between dubya and cheney. what a choice.
 

:: Shaman 5/03/2003 11:08:16 PM [+] ::
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funniest ethnic slur of the week (courtesy of family guy):

santa is ASIAN!

how can he be asian?! santa doesn't drive his sled 20 miles under the speed limit with his blinker on! go back to your rice paddy, mulan!!

 

:: Shaman 5/02/2003 08:21:47 AM [+] ::
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at the exact moment i write this, i'm watching the nation's single largest staged television appearance paid for by taxpayers in preparation for a presidential election that hasn't even started yet. it's not bad enough that he didn't actually WIN the last election, now he wants to make us all pay for appearances which will probably later be used in his tv campaign spots. my stomach roils at the very thought. my god i despise this man. and no amount of medication can seem to calm my utter and complete disgust at his very existence.

oh... and if you don't like it, kiss my ass and go read elsewhere. that's the beauty of america. he can steal an election and i can voice my opinion. and the courts would protect both of us equally. he. he. he. he.
 

:: Shaman 5/01/2003 09:08:59 PM [+] ::
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