:: it's a scary world: rants from a chemically imbalanced mind ::

:: Thursday, September 25, 2003 ::

good demonstration of the fact that a "wrong number" in im's can be a mentally scarring experience.... it went a little sumpin like THIS!

[22:23] Rsty140: hey
[22:23] Shaman: oy
[22:23] Shaman: and you would be......?
[22:23] Shaman: my guardian angel?
[22:24] Shaman: a man in black?
[22:24] Shaman: the spawn of satan?
[22:24] Shaman: the illegitimate son of thurston and lovey howell?
[22:24] Shaman: who is you be and who is you ain't, friend?
[22:25] Shaman: (and really, wouldn't the illegitimate son of thurston and lovey howell BE the spawn of satan pretty much anyway??)
[22:27] Shaman: C'mon, talk to me here.... it's your dime and you called me. Amuse me with anecdotes. Tickle my fancy. Or maybe you fancy my tickle. Either way, speak up, skippy.
[22:29] Shaman: YOO HOO!!! Who are jew peeples anyway?? (to be spoken in a similar accent to George Hamilton in "Zorro, The Gay Blade", easily one of the funniest movies ever.)
[22:39] Shaman: Do I scare you? Does my intimidating manner make your little pinky toes quiver? (Again, use the George Hamilton Voice Thingie.)

alas, i never recieved a reply. i think that the wonder of me was too much for he/she/it. but then again, i like to talk just to hear myself sometimes. :) again.... the wonder.... of me. and exactly WHY did i share all that with you? well, again.... it's that whole "just to hear myself" thing.... sometimes i just like to type to see what'll come from my fingers next. meanwhile, i think i'm poppin' in zorro, the gay blade. i'd advise you to do the same.
 

:: Shaman 9/25/2003 10:45:32 PM [+] ::
...

come here! go away. come here! go away. come here! go away. come here! go away.

for christ's sake, this SHIT IS GETTING OLD! that's it, george. keep getting our guys and gals killed, you hard line spouting despot.
 

:: Shaman 9/22/2003 08:10:07 PM [+] ::
...

it's the little things in life you MUST revel in. trust me. the BIG moments are so few and far between as to be oasis-like.... too far apart for a human to withstand... ergo, to retain one's sanity, one must enjoy the little, daily happy-thingies... whatever those thingies may be for you.... for me, it's bill paying night.... oh, yea... LOTS of fun there... spending money i don't have to pay for debts i didn't need to make.... ooh it sounds so pretty when you put it like that.... but i digress.... so i figure, if i'm gonna have to lay out this money, i'm gonna give somebody a moment's pause. like the bill in front of me now. for 191.33. now, i COULD send the minimum monthly payment of 10 bucks. but minimum monthly payments are for squinks. have some fun. when some poor data entry clerk goes to punch in your numbers, give him/her pause. don't pay ten bucks. pay 74.87. :) think about it. you KNOW whoever is typing that in is gonna stop for at LEAST a moment and tilt their head to the side and think "what the HELL was he thinkin?!?!". and you've given that person a moment's pause in their otherwise droll existence. and provided yourself (well, at least it works this way for me!) with a moment's chuckle at the possible reactions of the guy on the other end. so..... .yea...... that's all. just thinking out loud again. lighter. need a lighter.

oh.. and yea... cash died. major suckage. MAJOR. cash ruled. zevon died. again, major suckage. ritter died. major suckage. no three's company re-reunion. shit. seventies rule. yet still..... barry manilow lives and michael bolton breathes. and people WONDER why i don't believe in "a god".
 

:: Shaman 9/17/2003 11:09:09 PM [+] ::
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scary, i tell you. just scary.
 

:: Shaman 9/13/2003 01:58:21 PM [+] ::
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okay, if your one of those who tears up at the sight of the twin towers, go away. you don't wanna be here right now. because my first rant is guaranteed to piss some people off.

first off, if i hear one more thing about september 11th, i'm gonna puke. i've had two people stop me today and mention "oh, only two days till 9/11. what a horrible thing.". yea, it's a horrible thing whenever anyone (okay, MOSTLY anyone) dies needlessly and for the sake of "religion". or better yet, at the EXPENSE of a religious cause. BUT. (and you KNEW there was a but there.). BUT..... shit happens. humans age, flesh withers and people die. WHY is it SOOOOO much more of a tragedy when needless attacks and deaths like that happen EVERYDAY somewhere in the world? WHY? no one can seem to give me a good reason. "well, it was an unjustified attack!". uh, what, the suicide bombing in israel this morning was justified? the israelis rolling their tanks into the gaza strip and destroying the homes of individuals and families who have nothing to do with suicide attacks is justified? NO. we got pimp slapped by a bunch of terrorists and it scared the piss out of us. it's been going on for decades ELSEWHERE. but not here. hence the overwhelming "need" to make it an event. the average american mentality is best summed up by a t-shirt someone described to me recently ..... a big picture of the globe with uncle sam standing over it and a huge bite taken out of the globe with the phrase "America - because we can!". yup. that's us. america. well, maybe not anymore. maybe it's time we realized we are NOT the ONLY nation in the world that matters a damn.

secondly, i've said it before and i'll say it again - if you can't at LEAST run a computer in a rudimentary fashion (i.e. get your email, surf a web page, download a file (SAFELY!!), print a document, etc), then go ahead and hold your breath and jump off this big spinning globe we call earth. because you are about as useless as a third nipple. granted, we have allowed ourselves to become TOO reliant on computers, in my never humble opinion, but it's too late. the deed's done and that's just the way it is. get used to it. catch up quick or fall by the wayside. had a "user" today comment on how horrible all these "scary viruses" were... okay, first off, viruses aren't "scary". they're irritating. they're annoying. they're troublesome. but they're not scary. they can't tear your kneecaps off nor will they poke your eyes out. when i further related that viruses are just an everyday fact of life now and that i've NEVER been affected by one on ANY of my home systems, his reply was "yea, but you're an it guru". to which i replied, no i just use my common sense and update my virus protection everyday and have a firewall to protect my connection. nothing above and beyond what any other normal user should have in place. "you update EVERYDAY??!!", the person asked in an astonished manner. (no, gomer. i update once a year and pray that no one writes any new viruses) he further replied "but you shouldn't have to worry about stuff like that coming in to hurt your pc!". okay, THAT is an even dumber argument. when you go to bed at night, do you leave the front door open so you and your belongings are unprotected? of course not. you lock your door when you are in the house and when you are away from it. to protect it from invasion. do you just drive your car around on a daily basis and never perform any upkeep or maintenance on it? it's no different. if you don't occasionally check your oil level, check your tire pressure and maintain the engine, IT'S GOING TO DIE. but for some odd reason, humans can't equate upkeep and maintenance with computers. thank god. keeps me in a job. god forbid humans ever realize how truly simple computers are.

and finally, on a sidenote - this RIAA witchhunt thing has gone on way too long and this time has gone WAAAAYYYY too far. PERUSE THIS, o faithful reader..... a 12 year old. oh you manly men attorneys. stud puppets. you sued a 12 year old and won. sick assholes.
 

:: Shaman 9/09/2003 11:46:34 PM [+] ::
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